Oh NO! Yoko!

Poor Yoko! Her name has become synonimous with breaking up relationships and she was blamed for the break up of the Beatles.   I lost my best friend to such a person.  I had known her for several years and helped her through the loss of her husband when he died of cancer.  I held her hand and hugged her when she cried, laughed with her. Loved and protected her.  I thought we would be friends forever.

When “he” came along, I tried to like him.  I tried.  He didn’t respect our friendship or the history that we had.  He belittled my place in her life as if I was just some person she ran into on occasion as some bar.

It’s true! One person can come along and ruin the energy and flow of a group. I’ve seen it happen many times.

It’s wonderful to meet that special someone. To fall in love. But remember that our friends are the ones who stand by us and are there especially when love turns sour.

We should NEVER allow a romance to take the place of the friendships that we have developed and nurtured over time. Our friends are the one constant thing that we have in life.

If a new boyfriend or girlfriend does not like our friends, that should be a big RED FLAG!  We should not allow ourselves to be isolated from our one true support system.  It can get lonely when all we have is one person in our life. 

Friendships can be ruined.  Friendships need nurturing and cannot be put on the backburner.  In otherwords, you don’t call your friends ONLY when your boyfriend/girlfriend is busy and you have nothing better to do. 

My friend would call me when her boyfriend was busy and then cancel if his plans changed. 

When she was with me, he was calling constantly and she would be talking “baby talk” to him on her cell phone while I sat there twittling my thumbs.  He didn’t like her spending time with me. 

A munipulative and controlling type of person will not embrace our friends.  Why? Because they can’t stand for us to show attention to anyone outside of the relationship. They are threatened and/or jealous if they are not the main focus!

Hell, they’ll think of reasons for you to get rid of your cat, your dog and your KIDS!  They’ll make labels for your friends and persuade you to get rid of them too!  If you have ANY friends left, they will be THEIR friends and nobody you knew before the relationship started.  Then “poof” you are all alone and isolated! 

Sometimes when love is new, we lose our focus of what’s happening. Just like ice cream and chocolate. It’s wonderful, but it needs to be taken in moderation. It’s the same with everything. Too often people get all schmoopie poopie goo goo ga ga and their whole world turns to shit.

I was once in a relationship with a man who wouldn’t even let me go to the bathroom by myself.  I was all goo goo ga ga over him in the beginning and guess what?  When we broke up, I had to load a u-haul all by myself.  I had lost touch with everyone I knew and not only that… I probably made them sick with the way I fawned all over the guy in the beginning.  I had no idea that several years later, I would not have a single friend to support me. 

I used to go out with all of my friends
we had us some good times I never thought they would end
But then I met you and I can’t forget the day
You convinced me to settle down and change my ways

All of my frineds stopped coming around and I started dressing the way you liked
Then one day I took a look in the mirror and it was then I realized

You’re my Yoko Ono
You’re the one who makes all the rules
You’re my Yoko Ono
and I’m just your fool

Do I have something on my face?

I was watching the Tyra Banks show today. I’ve only watched it a couple of times but found today’s show rather interesting. The topic was on etiquette and how many of today’s folks have let it go to the way side.

The guest was Lizzie Post, daughter of the famed, Emily Post.

One of the main focuses on the show was people with horrible table manners and how they behaved when they went out to eat in public restaurants. 

Through out the show I could not stop thinking about something that happened not too long ago. Something so completely disgusting and embarrassing that I was shocked that my friend would even kiss the mouth of the guy who was putting on the show at our table when we dined out with her and her (cringe) boyfriend.

We went out to dinner at rib night at a local restaurant. It had been a long time since I got to spend anytime with my friend as she was consumed by this creep the minute she started dating him. She’s an attractive, intelligent woman with a good career yet she has a habit of picking up strays who drain her finances, self esteem and energy as they need to be taken care of and this man was no exception. Damn! I wish she would stop settling and wait for the kind of man she deserves, to come along. (But that’s a whole other story!) Back to this one….

So, we’re sitting at the table and the ribs are delivered. They also gave us an ample supply of wet napkins to keep our hands clean and prevent too much of a mess. Well this guy proceeds to grab a handful of ribs rubbing his hands all over the barbecue sauce, then rubs the sauce all over his face. His face is now not only dripping with sauce but it is stained red where some of the sauce has come off.

Every single party or server who passes our table has to hear him yell out, “Do I have something on my face?” We go through this scenario over and over and over. Passerby’s stopping to giggle at this idiot who thinks he is clever.

Now the kicker to the story is…. He also has a huge glob of snot dripping down his nose and into his mustache.  Reminded me of a two year old kid. I kept wondering if he knew. I wondered if my friend noticed. Why wasn’t she saying something? She’s sitting right next to him!!!  I didn’t know if I should say something or tell him he needed to wipe his nose. Funny, in the midst of this, I’m trying to think of the polite thing to do. hahaha…. I began to laugh and giggle even though I was so grossed out I stopped eating.

I Could not even take a bite of those delicious ribs with him sitting across from me barbecue sauce stained face with snot running down his nose into his mustache. He reached across the table and grabbed a roll and put it on my plate. Then made the comment that he washed his hands. I wondered if this was some cruel joke. Was he doing this on purpose?

I had my flip video camera in my purse so I decided to film this little episode. Hell, I was done eating. He then stuck bones in his mouth and held on to bones in both hands and began to pose for me. I kept telling him that this was not a camera. He just kept posing. Yep, it’s caught on video, snot and all. Not that I’m doing anything with it. I could not believe that a grown man would act this way.  I don’t even know why I filmed it.  Don’t know why I sat there and laughed when I was apparently not amused.  It was an odd and uncomfortable situation all together. 

I don’t understand why my friend would be with someone who acts like that. 

I decided after that episode of his antics, (not the first time he’s grossed me out) I was done.  I’ll be polite, say hello when I run into him at social occasions and avoid him as much as possible.

I hate feta!

I can’t seem to escape feta cheese.  It’s in everything!  It seems that the majority of people I socialize with love love love the stuff.  To me it tastes like vomit.  Care for some salad with sprinkles of vomit?  How about some vomit kiech (I probably misspelled that)?  Uh, no thanks. 

 

When I first moved to California in 1986.  I couldn’t escape cilantro.  Californians love that stuff.  At first I didn’t understand why the Mexican restaurant’s food tasted soapy.  The food didn’t taste like that in Texas.  I was used to TexMex.   Over the years, I’ve learned to deal with it.  I don’t love cilantro, but I did succumb and surrender and accept it, and now I can tolerate it in salsa.  I try to eat around it but an occasional sprig doesn’t gag me like it used to.  Still, I don’t think I will EVER be able to tolerate any kind of goat cheese. 

 

Perhaps my dislike of cheeses came from a cheese trauma I suffered as a child.  I was at an “adult” party and saw a tray of chocolate balls rolled in nuts.  I took one and bit into it.  It WAS NOT chocolate but blue cheese.  My eyes watered, I turned green and ran to the bathroom to throw up and wash my mouth out.  To this day I can’t even look at a cheese ball without remembering the shock of the blue cheese flavor. 

 

Oh, but how I wish I could love cheese.  It would make it so much more enjoyable when I dine out or go to a party.  I could order an omelet at a sidewalk cafe without fear.  It seems like the nicer and classier the joint, the more likely they are to serve goat cheese.  =)  Ahhhhhhhrg!!!! 

 

Feta feta everywhere and not a bite to eat.  I hate feta.